Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Let's Talk Poo

Yea, I said it.  I want to talk about poopy diapers.  Caca pants.  The smelly nastiness our children make in their diapers that are those wonderful messy and gross surprises. 

How many daddy's do you know will willingly change a diaper such as this?  You know what kind of diaper I'm talking about.  The one where your child is testing the limits of their diaper by filling it with as much poo as they can.  And the diaper fails. -__-  Yea, it's coming out the sides, up the back, down the legs.  You know it.  That kind of diaper.  The one where a bath is required after you finally get most of the poo cleaned up with wipes and yet it's just not enough.

Well, Daddy was taking care of baby this afternoon and he picked her up out of her exersaucer to play with her for a bit.  He suddenly sniffs loudly then lifts baby's bottom up to his nose, takes a big whiff and makes a wretched noise.  He then tries to hand her off to me! 

I'm all, "Uh uh.  You can change a poopy diaper for once.  It's not going to kill you." 

He sighs and gets everything ready and begins the process of diaper changing.  He gets her pants off and her onsie undone and realizes that it's one of THOSE diapers.  He starts to gag.  I'm laughing, on the inside of course because laughing outwardly would be inconsiderate at this point. 

Yet he continues, all manly and tells me she is in need of a bath.  I take a look and there is one tiny little line of poo on her back.  BARELY visible.  I tell him no, she just needs to be wiped down.  He sighs and continues on. 

I am sure he said she needed a bath just so he could hand her off to me and be done with the poo.  

He finishes up, redresses her and looks her square in the eye as he says, "If you do that again on Dad's watch I am going to just hose you down.  Got it?" 

I couldn't help but laugh out loud this time.  Like she has any idea what he's talking about. 

It's a rarity that he will change a poopy diaper after being asked and even rarer for him to do it WITHOUT being asked. 

Again, one of those little things that my family does to drive me nutters. 

Tuesday, January 29, 2013

It's the little things really

That's right.  We all have them and know them.  The little annoying things your family members do that absolutely drive you mad.  I've decided to start this blog to share and remember just those things. 

For instance, today my 8 month old daughter somehow managed to leak through her diaper in a matter of two hours.  TWO HOURS.  It's a regular size three Target brand diaper.  I've never had this issue with these diapers before.  In fact, I buy the Target brand diapers because they're fantastic for their price. 

Anywho, Daddy decides to go get her because she's whining in her pack and play, tired of playing by herself and in need of some attention.  Not more than two seconds after walking into her room I hear him say, "Why are you wet?  You're soaked from head to toe!"  She is giggling of course because daddy is talking to her and making funny faces.  He continues, "How did you get all wet?  OMG It's all peepee! But it's only been two hours!  I don't understand but I can't deal with this." 

He comes back into our room and says to me with a weird look of disgust on his face, "Honey, I just can't deal with that.  She is covered in pee from head to toe.  I don't know how or what to do." 

Ummmm...dude, it's pee.  It's just PEE!  At least she isn't covered in POOP from head to toe! 

My response, "Seriously?  Honey, it's just pee.  At least it isn't poop.  Please bring her here and take all of her wet stuff from her bed downstairs." 

He comes into the bedroom carrying her under her armpits and holding her out away from his body.  I couldn't help but giggle.  Men.  LOL 

He still can't change a poopy diaper to this day without gagging.  And I'm pregnant with our second child.  It's going to be interesting times for me if he can't get over some peepee disasters.  The last time she had a poopy disaster where it was coming out all sides of her diaper he put the diaper back on and brought her to me, gagging the entire time. 

These are the little things I'm talking about, the annoying little things.  He can't change a diaper or handle a peepee disaster. 

And trust me, there are and will be many more to come.